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(Tuesday, September 30, 2008-)
+1:03 AM]*
# Christianese
Came to a mini conclusion today that the worst place to see yourself, is through your own eyes. Of course the best place is through God's eyes. Next or perhaps maybe even equal, would be through the eyes of faith, a concept i must admit is constantly proving itself to be new to me.
Somehow the lenses which we view others are also distorted. Maybe because of the fall, maybe because of our cognitive development, social circumstance or perhaps simple personal preferences. I guess it makes so much more sense for 2 Corinthians 5:17 to be taken literally. Cuz living as a human being, i can't be what the Bible says i can be.
Before i close off a (not-necessarily-good) eventful day, some closing thoughts about things in Christianity i don't quite understand.
It was for freedom that Christ set us free
The LORD make his face shine upon you
Doxologies
Benedictions
The Jerusalem Council
oh well, mostly jz for intellectualism's sake, perhaps better if I don't know all things. Knowledge puffs up, love builds up!
Wonder what "more than love" actually meant.. hmm....
the story ends like this;
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(Monday, September 29, 2008-)
+5:37 PM]*
# Neither or Both?
Am i neither here nor there... or am i both here and there?
And something i promised myself to list down, the list 1.0
E (perangsang)
H (rendah diri)
C (penyayang)
A (aktif)
S (mudah bergaul)
and the mandatory
D
OF (membara)
and i don't know if i'll ever be there.
Put on a smile, keep on going (=
the story ends like this;
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(Friday, September 26, 2008-)
+12:28 AM]*
# Salvation Is Here
Shout out to God, Xiu Ying got saved today!! Yup, had the awesome privilege of leading her in the sinner's prayer, and now she's part of the family!!! *hugs all round*
LESSON learnt!
All things are possible to those who BELIEVE. The cell group was awesome and we ALL believe and confessed and prayed and fasted that she will be saved today, and she was! Yup, definitely gotta believe with all my heart that nothing is impossible!!! for those who believe!
Okie, im crazily high now!! But i bet the angels in heaven are rejoicing even more!!
But seriously all praise to God. And secondly praise to the cell group that rallied together to sow into this life. Got her her Bible, got her notes, bookmarks, etc! Now gonna get her going on her new life with God!!
Oh yeah. That's all i wanted to blog about really. Just a shout out to God for His and ONLY His work of salvation in Xiu Ying!!
Salvation Is Here!!
Now it's on to greater heights. But still gonna give all praise to God! Gonna keep on trusting Him, gonna work harder, trust more and do more for Him! Yup!
the story ends like this;
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(Tuesday, September 23, 2008-)
+12:27 AM]*
# Shopping Day Out
Big shout out to Alvin for shopping with me today, though he didn't get anything (revenge!! haha joking joking) Txs so much and sorry for ur weird Macs lunch.
Travelled across to the west. But the west didn't let me down! Firstly i found a shirt that i liked within the 3rd or 4th shop! Almost got the black one, but apparently the white one looks nicer on me! So yay! I think both look nice, it's jz the ironing nightmare! (and the exercise to stay in shape!)
Then looked like almost forever for jeans. Yes, i actually shopped for jeans! This is the first pair of jeans i actually bought for myself! Yes, it IS possible to survive 21 years WITHOUT jeans. Of course the one the cell + 1 got for me is truly appreciated! But now this jeans is straight cut (deletes memory of slim fit nightmare) and has vertical lines. I think that makes it really unique. Plus the material is so not like jeans! WHEEEE ... I realise i jz lost the point of actually wearing jeans, but oh well, i like it that way (=
Then scoured around almost hopelessly for shoes. Found one that was cheap but felt like slim wrap for my feet. Then stumbled upon the one i bought. Not really my style, but it doesn't look bad, doesn't feel like plastic wrap held together by sewings and laces, (still) doesn't feel as comfortable as sports shoes, but doesn't burst the budget AND doesn't clash with the jeans or the shirt. So tadaa~~ A whole new look under $100! And that's my shopping for the YEAR! (yes u guys will still get Christmas presents)
After that took MRT back to the east. Bought dinner and ate at Fang's talked quite a lot, watched tv very distractedly, went online a bit here and there... and finally reached back here to give my new look a wash!! Excited now!
So yup, that was my day out. Tmr's studing with Jean, and then in the night perhaps listen to AFV sermon! Then if im really on a roll, prepare for prayer sharing!
the story ends like this;
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(Monday, September 22, 2008-)
+1:30 AM]*
# Post #201!
Here's a new (old) song for a new season. This is my song of the season.
F C
Don't let my love grow cold
Gm Bb
I'm calling out, light the fire again
C Don't let my vision die
Gm Bb F C Gm Bb
I'm calling out, light the fire again
F C
You know my heart, my deeds
Gm Bb
I'm calling out, light the fire again
F C
I need your discipline
Gm Bb
I'm calling out, light the fire again
Gm Dm Bb C
I am here to buy gold refined in the fire
Bb F C
Naked and poor, wretched and blind I come
Eb Bb
Clothe me in white
Csus Bb
So I won't be ashamed
F C Gm Bb
Lord, light the fire again
©1994 Mercy / Vineyard Publishing
Words and Music by Brian Doerksen
A song of long ago, but it suddenly came back to me. Lord, light the fire again. There was the combined camp with Church of Shekinah Glory (CSG). Then there was the Asia Pacific Youth Alive Conference. Then there's Authority for Victory.
Don't ever let my love grow cold. Without love, words are just noise. Actions are just distractions.
Don't let my vision die. Without vision, I perish. Without vision and direction, im running wild. Im wandering in the wilderness.
You know my heart, my deeds. Search my heart, show me my motives. Let your word divide between bone and marrow. Let me see me as i really am. Wretched and blind, naked and poor. Clothe me with robes white washed in Your blood. Let me stand blameless in Your presence. Let me shine with the reflection of Your glory.
I need Your discipline. Enough said. Im calling out, light the fire again.
the story ends like this;
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(Saturday, September 20, 2008-)
+12:46 AM]*
# New Day
Today was a rather interesting day. Realise now that i only had less than 6 hours of sleep. Should get more soon. Thank God tuition kid bailed on me i guess?
Coming back to the day. Was doing powerpoint and had a really nice donate ur old desktop one done when Aunty Susan told me no need to repeat the announcement so i went on to the other ones. Realised my style is slowly changing. The S+E+L+F+ctrl poster has slight links to the Tanjong Batu announcement now that i think of it.
Moving along from there, went off for lunch with SJ, Kelly and Lizzie. Did feel a little out of place and hope i didn't like... prevent anyone from saying anything or jz making he atmosphere weird. Well, actually im quite sure it was a little weird with me there... but still im thankful that i got a chance to hear the conversation.
I will admit that the conditions at which i was "thrust" into cell leadership weren't ideal on "my conditions" but hey, it's God's condition, and Im sure He knows what He's doing. And yeah, like what SJ said, that the day i chose to accept the task to take Chellie's cell for 2 months, God saw that decision i made and He now sees me as a cell leader... though i may "delude" myself that it's jz a "temp job" or some rubbish like that. Yup, i guess this was my second lesson in cell leadership? The first was really unexpected, in India where the Missions Team spent two whole sessions explaining the concept to the Nagas.. and there i was inthe background appearing to be video-ing the session but secretly learning as much as i could.
Learnt and got reminded of some very important things by what she drilled her kids with. Cell Mandate. Under ideal conditions, i wished i had my own cell from scratch and i wanted to actually have a cell distinctive sort of (realise there's a lot of words that can describe a cell group's mission/vision etc).. Planned to have everyone share their views and what's most important to the cell they ideally would wanna see. And from there create the cell distinctive and hence a unique identity (= I want my cell to be unique, peculiar and definitely all out!
Also begin to reconsider the "powerfulness" (what a bad choice of words) of a cell group. Gotta remind myself that in the process of getting to know them better, i musn't compromise on the power that's possible in the gathering of God's saints.
Then thought of the expanded vision. If i see myself taking this task as literally taking care of 3-4 "cell kids" i realise im only ever gonna stay that way. Then i thought of myself in Kelly or Lizzie's shoes. O levels and up to 30 kids. Scared. But then again... i gotta start envisioning my cell. How big i dream is how big it will be. Sure, faithful with small first... but doesn't mean i don't need to begin in a small way. Realise that being faithful with small things isn't about doing small things, it's about thinking big, excellent and ridiculous even when things are small. That's being faithful with the small that will get me to the big things.
What else did i learn? Well, perhaps how to be "drill-ish" and yet not condemnming? How to treat "second-liners" and many other pracical stuff!
Today music was good. Somehow i dunno why but i felt like smiling the whole time Alvin was sharing. But felt very restrained. But the worship part was ... different. Somehow it was so easy to engage God. And, Jesus, I called out to You. As a person, the first time that "reality" of shouting out Your name. Wow... It's You, and the reality of You. Something definitely broke through. Though i dunno why im a little down here in Sennett. Perhaps it was cuz the poster wasn't turning out "perfect".
Anyway, the main topic of the night really is dreams. My YA Cell Leadership dream. My NUS VCF Revival Dream. My Praise and Worship Dream. Can't let it be "blur blur" but gotta solidify and commit to them. Be directed in life!
Yup, no matter what the enemy tries to say or convince me, I know I called out for You today. You are more than just a name, a man or a god. You're Jesus (=
the story ends like this;
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(Wednesday, September 17, 2008-)
+11:28 PM]*
# APYAC
Haha!!I just have to blog about this! Was at VCF/IFG/PGPCG today and had a chance to randomly talk to Natalie and i found out she went for the Asia Pacific Youth Alive Conference too!!!!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
AHHHHH!!!!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!
Haha! Okie, i doubt many of you know the impact that conference had on my life. And we both still remember the final altar call of that conference!!! AHHHHH!!!
WHEEEE~~~
HAPPY!
not anymore. good enough?
the story ends like this;
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(Tuesday, September 16, 2008-)
+12:00 AM]*
# Prayer in the battle
Heys God (=
Things are roughing up this week, and by faith i will receive the wisdom. Your promise is there, and anything I believe I can receive. So i just wanna ask for wisdom, which I believe You already offer to me. Thanks for it, and by this i'll grow my faith.
One more level up! And with this wisdom, I'll bring glory to Your name, Jesus (=
Now for me to internalise it. New creation, and all things are possible to me who believes!!
See you tmr at 8am! Send me a reminder for the appointment k? Txs God (=
Yay, bought my first non-disposable shaver today. Apparently it's much sharper than the previous ones. Blood! hee... oh well, im accepting the fact im 21, and while it's sad to learn such stuff on my own, im still happy that i have Daddy God. Not a substitute for a physical parent though. Holy Spirit can u teach me these things? Actually im quite sure u can! Yup, not a substitute, U're jz the best! One day i'll learn about shaving cream! Hehe.. for now meche will have to jz work solo! Though i'm still like having an L-plate driving you. haha!
Other stuff that im learning? Well, rather private, but I guess the school of the Holy Spirit has modules in all faculties. Timely yes. Tough yes. Confirm from God? YES. Haha. Like what Ps Tan said, it's very easy to figure out the false word, it's always the easier way out! Oh, and Holy Spirit, txs for the knowledge of what it contextually meant that Your burden is easy and Your yoke is light! So yup, got quite a few new modules in UHS. Some of the older modules still haven't graduate from it yet! Hope to graduate from it soon.
Think i've graduated from the JOY1101. Now it's FA1101, RC1101, PR2101, CGL1001 and a few electives along the way! whee~~ Next lesson in the UHS, 8am!! sleep arr!!
the story ends like this;
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(Monday, September 8, 2008-)
+11:48 PM]*
# Lesson from a reading
This would be my weirdest QT ever!
Almost overnight, Singapore's future was put to question." Would Singapore survive? Lee's answer to Harold Wilson was illuminating. "Do not worry about Singapore," Lee wrote to the
British premier a fortnight after separation, "My colleagues and I are sane, rational people even in our moments of anguish. We weigh all possible consequences before we make any move on the political chessboard". He added, "Our people have the will to fight and the stuff that makes for survival".
An extract from my Singapore Studies, SSA 2204 Nation Building In Singapore.
Putting the "scripture" into context, let's go to O
Observation : Do not worry, as said in Luke 12:22
Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear."
Just as what LKY could tell the British after the separation, so did Jesus say the same thing, though before His "separation" from us.
Application : When faced in sudden trials (hehe), like how Singapore was suddenly thrust into independence (hehe, the links are so obvious... God is really quite humourous), God calmly tells me "do not worry", that God is still sane, He hasn't gone berserk and let the world run loose. When the future is suddenly uncertain once again, God says that He's still there "in our moments of anguish" as said in Psalm 118:5
"In my anguish I cried to the LORD, and He answered by setting me free"
Observation : We weigh all possible consequences before we make any move. This is a way to be aware of temptation. Many times, the devil doesn't succeed in luring us into sin by making evil look so good or glorified, but by removing the consequences of it.
Application : Like the wise LKY (haha, this is so funny!!), even in moments of anguish, in "depression" and "emo-ness", i must still remember to consider the consequences of my actions. How it could let the devil put God to shame, how it hurts the heart of my Saviour who "freely gave it all for us" and how it destroys my destiny. Ps Martin Steel also preached on this in The Way of Escape, that the window of escape becomes harder to find, the nearer I get to sinning. Further, from The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, Screwtape is reminded of his job that it is not primarily to put thoughts INTO the Christian head, but rather to stop his train of thoughts from that which would think of the consequences of his actions. To live for the temporal, the now. The only thing that the Bible calls (that I know of) to live in "the now", is the NOW FAITH (Hebrews 11)
Observation : Our people have the will to fight and the stuff that makes for survival. This shows me two parts for "survival". Too bad LKY was always constrained in his "survival mentality", though admittedly crucial for the post 65, pre 80 Singapore. Firstly, there is a will involved in overcoming. And secondly, there's is a substance of character required to carry it through.
Application : For the will part, it's really quite simple. Like Rach said, most of the time, it's not the casting out of demons, but of crucifying the flesh. The Bible clearly states our current state,
Matthew 26:41 "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak." And the best way to not let the body win is by the power of the baptism of Christ. From my new favourite book, Colossians 2:9-12
9For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, 10and you have been given fullness in Christ, who is the head over every power and authority. 11In him you were also circumcised, in the putting off of the sinful nature, not with a circumcision done by the hands of men but with the circumcision done by Christ, 12having been buried with him in baptism and raised with him through your faith in the power of God, who raised him from the dead.
Christ is the head over EVERY power, which definitely includes the "body" which is weak.This sinful-natured body can be put to death, and not jz killed and left like a dead murder corpse, but given a proper burial (so that everyone (that includes me) knows this proclamation of death) in the baptism. And coupled with FAITH in the power of God, I am alive in Christ. A new creation. A G/god-man race!
And the stuff that makes for survival will come, as I continue to exercise this new baby in the spiritual. It will start with the transforming of the mind (reference Cultural Mandate 1 SHUJING, YOU ONLY GAVE ME THE FIRST SERMON!! ROARR!!) and then move on to other aspects as I begin to put on the ind of Christ, move in the supernatural, let the light shine in my life (Life and Light sermon) and with the fruit of the Spirit, along with perseverance that builds character, and hope, that does not disappoint, in the soon coming King (=
Final observation : God sees me as one who has the will and the "stuff" to overcome, that I can be sure He's not only "sane and rational" but has my best interest at heart, with all the challenges I face. If God is confident I can handle it, I should be too!
Prayer : Lord, thank You for Your revelation of Your word through a seemingly gnosis-only lecture reading. I pray that I will put this continued new revelation into practice! Lord help me by transforming my mind to comprehend the aweness of ME as a new creation in YOU. Bless my studies, expecially my upcoming tests, that I can testify that with You, I can have both the will and the "stuff" to not only "survive" hard times, but in the deepest valley, to still have the light of life shining brightly in NUS for You. Bless my upcoming cells too, in Jesus' name i pray, AMEN!
the story ends like this;
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(Sunday, September 7, 2008-)
+12:00 AM]*
# 98%
Tired!
Praise and worship night was ok... Below expectations,especially of myself. Let's look at the bad side of things first.
The Time Has Come intro was screwed up towards the end cuz i couldn't really hear Alvin.. Should have counted the beats myself.. Then the bass solo... let's not even talk about that one...
Tell The World, once again when the bass has it's own line...
Other songs that were uber messy.. the infamous Desert Song, With Everything, Shout To The Lord, I should have transposed the chords...
Also realised it's hard to play and worship/praise at the same time. Have to constantly remind myself to worship/praise... grrr
Ok.. on to better parts... hmmm.. well, i hope God's happy (=
Yup, that's about it. Very tired... still need to wash apparel, and tmr got CE! Yay! So that's another thing to look forward to, though i feel like sleeping after church...
Ok ok, why on't i jz sleep now! HAHA! Genius! Bye!
the story ends like this;
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(Thursday, September 4, 2008-)
+11:53 PM]*
# Baptized
I realise now im not just Adamic... That was a pretty childish thing to be happy about.
Cuz if God came to redeem a fallen race and restore them to their original intent, that would be quite mediocre. But my God is a good of abundance, exceedingly above anything i can ask for or imagine.
And truly, He has given me much more than i've asked for. I only asked to be identified in His family. But He chose to let me be identified in His death and resurrection. He didn't jz repair me... nope, that's "too easy" for Him, He made me a new creation.
1 Timothy is one pretty "scary" book. AND BTW, THE " " DENOTES MY OWN VOCAB, THEY DO NOT CONVEY THEIR ENGLISH LEXICONAL MEANINGS Maybe only because of 2:5, Colossians is also pretty "shocking"...
Anyway, back to the point, i think getting so much of knowledge is good, but the relationship is still paramount (= But still, i like it, there's so much to love about "this" God. So yeah, learning more about Him, makes me know Him more. His personality, how He is like, what are the sort of things He likes to do. And apparently creation is one of them (= The creative God (=
So yup, im more than Adamic... im "baptized". Dead to sin, alive in Christ, seated in the heavenly places, with Christ Jesus (=
the story ends like this;
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